Role Reversal
If you've been following Ben's Blog, you'll know we just made an offer on a condo. Can you believe it?! All of a sudden, I've got real-job paychecks and a fiancé and a realtor which merge to make a owning a piece of property the clear course. May God grant us wisdom and power in our stewardship, if this comes through!
Ben and I have been going through a pre-marital counseling book and attending a class for newly married and engaged couples at church. Last week we even went to the "Saving your Marriage before it Starts" conference. Except for the stories about Bob and Sherri’s tantrums in the book, what we've been learning is amazing. There are so many things I didn't even know I didn't know about the way guys think; about how to serve each other's different needs; how to communicate in different situations; and quite amazing, how most couples experience the same problems, challenges and blessings as us.
One of the more life-changing things I've heard, though, applies to every Christian. Everyone has different “life-paths.” We were taught the basic concepts from “Sacred Pathways” by Gary Thomas, which is that we all have different spiritual learning styles. The nine main paths are:
1. Tradition—those who draw closest to God’s heart through practicing Lent, celebrating Christmas, Easter, etc. Generally tend towards Catholism, Episcopaleanism, etc.
2. Vision—those who are driven by goals and grand schemes: salvation for orphans in Honduras, for example, or uniting the girls in the college group together in fellowship.
3. Relationship—those who thrive in group Bible studies, in encouragement and fellowship, but perhaps have a hard time focusing on reading the Bible on their own.
4. Intellect—those who find freedom through understanding scripture, studying, cross-referencing, etc. and believe that information can change your life.
5. Service—those who live by mother Theresa’s quote, along the lines of “When I see the faces of those I serve, I see the face of Christ.”
6. Contemplation—those whose most precious gift to God is their time: hours of it, spent journaling and thinking and “Just being with God.”
7. Activism—honestly, I tuned out while this one was explained, and so can’t do it justice. I do plan to read the book and find out more, however.
8. Nature—those who love the Psalms when they say “the heavens declare the glory of the Lord!” They primarily feel connected to God by seeing his work.
9. Worship—those who worship in any way possible, I think, but do find singing and other overt forms of worship very meaningful.
Your path helps you to grow the most spiritually—it’s where your passion is. I can see different paths playing more important roles at different times in my life. My main paths are contemplation and intellect. But at times my intellectual studies have discovered important truths in tradition. My vision is fueled by my intellect (to spread the information about the exciting things I’m learning and studying, as I’m doing now) and as most girls, relationships are a vital part of my spiritual growth. Nature and worship are sometimes an important part of my contemplation.
One of the reasons these are so good to know is that I have judged people of different paths, considering them not as spiritual as me, and of course not as close to God. Now I can see that just because someone isn’t riled up about discussing Greek meanings and random theology with me, or doesn’t find spending hours sitting on a stump and journaling to be a pivotal spiritual experience doesn’t mean that they aren’t just as close to God as I am.
Ben loves to serve. He finds joy and fulfillment in helping others. He has told me on numerous occasions that he dreams about fixing missionary’s computers. “That’s cool!” I enthuse, “You mean that you want to open up opportunities to go and encourage them?” “Well, that would be nice too,” he replies, “But I really want to help by fixing their computers.”
Service is my weakest path. I see it as both great and necessary but it doesn’t make me feel closer to God. When I serve, I serve to achieve other ends, and when others have prioritized the service itself, I tend to think them shortsighted. Now I can see that fixing computers for missionaries is an end in itself, and a very worthy one too.
The second reason it’s good to be familiar with the spiritual paths is so you can feed yourself. They are very similar to spiritual disciplines, in fact.
Lately, I have not dedicated hours to prayer over a cuppa joe and a journal. I have not pulled out my concordance and online-study tools in a long time. Though I daily pray and often read my Bible, my spiritual life has been lacking. Now I know why: I have not been feeding my paths. I have not been practicing the spiritual disciplines which I know will help me to walk with God.
Isn’t this a huge revelation?
Well, I didn't even get to the subject related to the title of this blog entry. And now it's long and time to head to the bed. Maybe later I'll come back to it, if you're lucky, but for now it's staying there like a mis-matched sock. I kinda like that.
:) Lis
